I really would appreciate it if people would stop sending me messages calling me a TERF for detransitioning/my mindset on my own sexuality & gender expression. fact is, for me, living as a trans man for nearly a decade (though I’d argue i never was able to reach the status of “man”, only “boy”, no matter how hard i tried) & the dysphoria that led me to transition, is impossible to totally separate from starting my period, my eating disorder, being increasingly sexualized/catcalled, feeling at odds with the girls in my school (there were Zero out lesbians in 8th grade there!) and the way i wished to be seen, a desperate need to make men hate me less.. etc… And i’m suddenly discouraged from sharing ANY of this bc it seems that everyone assumes i’m diagnosing all trans men/afab nb people as being this way???? But i’m not? I’m talking about MY LIFE it’s a very specific set of circumstances… it’s laughable anybody thinks i’m influential enough to like be a threat to the legitimacy of trans people, simply by acknowledging that for ME PERSONALLY there were complex factors involved and while i don’t think it’s valuable to live in regret of my transition, i don’t find it to be a valid identity for myself.

I’ve gotten 3 messages this week, typed differently enough to suggest they were sent by 3 different people, and like i get the sense that it’s just ppl being sensitive and thinking i’m attacking the trans community. I’m not. please don’t make this about other people; just because everyone’s story isn’t the same as mine, just because you find it insulting when applied to *your* life, does not invalidate my own experience with my body and identity.

If the concept of “reclaiming my womanhood” – MINE specifically – is some kind of “TERF dogwhistle” to anyone, then that is their assumption and not my responsibility.

I have found peace in my body and my mind. don’t trivialize me.